Holy cow, how can it be that time of year again? The last month has been full of searching Spotify and sifting through this year’s slate of potential Christmas CDs vying for the top slots. It’s a significantly more mixed bag than last year with a variety of old and new pop acts and the new wave of expanded Deluxe albums of previously released material. It’s also unbelievable that this marks 17 years of creating this annual tradition The recipe for the perfect Playlist is a now a time-tested standard: select a generous helping of the best of this season, add a handful of leftovers that didn’t fit past lists, a pinch or two of current topical salutes, and a touch of the occasional novelty number, all resulting in this effort of love to my friends and followers for the holiday season.
First again: the criteria. [Regular readers can skip this paragraph. The rules will never change.] In this analysis, points are awarded more for taking a particular selection of music and making it not only entertaining and fresh, but showing the artist one is famous for being in the interpretation–within the boundaries of the material. Also, while new original breakout singles are encouraged, the CD should be heavy on standards and classics. Plus the one you all know: under no circumstance may your CD contain a cover of “Christmas Shoes”. That is grounds not only for disqualification, but for permanent banning from all future lists. Now the results…
THE EXPANSIONS
Pentatonix, A Pentatonix Christmas (Deluxe Version) The reigning royal family of a capella expand last year’s prestigious effort with four new tracks that, despite being top quality, strangely dilute the album a little. The only issue one may have is that the bulk of the new arrangements are wonderful, but starting to show the stock a capella tricks that the quintet have managed to avoid in the past by pushing the boundaries and redefining the form. These by contrast sound a little basic in their approach. They’re still very good, but one just has come to expect more from the leaders of this pack. The best new cut is by far the collaboration with Jennifer Hudson on “How Great Thou Art” (initiated and perfected by their a capella country cousins Home Free, now seemingly the ubiquitous new entry for all a capella holiday fare). Old Grade: A+/Deluxe Grade: Still a Solid A
Olivia Newton-John & John Farnham, Friends for Christmas (Deluxe Version) The pop legend and her 70’s Australian chart topping counterpart team up decades later to provide a soothing, easy on the ears collection of standards. Straddling the bridge between Time Life Classic Christmas and their easy listening FM roots, the album is a treat for their career long fans, of whom this critic is one (#TeamOlivia). Despite pushing 70 (!), their voices are still reminiscent enough of what we remember, and Farnham works to balance more with Miss Newton-John’s at times delicate voice to significantly greater effect than former partner John Travolta did trouncing all over her tracks a few years ago. Although less playful than her turn with Travolta, Farnham provides a better vocal match here. Infused with a holiday sweetness and nostalgic grace, they are an enjoyable blend on everything from the bouncy “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” and a warm “Silver Bells” to the more reverent “The First Noel” and “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing”. Considering that few pop stars her age are still performing, and the recent recurrence of her long in remission breast cancer, we should embrace every effort she extends her fans. Technically this offering is being treated as an original release since the original version was not released in the US, but only as an Australian import. Grade: A-, very appreciative of the effort
Peter Hollens, A Hollens Family Christmas (Deluxe Version) The workhorse of the genre, indie one-man a capella group Hollens expands last year’s admirable effort with even better results. Added are his superior “Angels from the Realms of Glory” duet with American Idol vocal wonderboy David Archuleta, “How Great Thou Art” (see, again) with the American Boy’s Choir, and an unnecessary duet of “O Holy Night” with lesser singer Jamie Grace (at least Hollens saves all the money notes for himself). More variety and more standards improves on Hollens’ sometimes borderline melancholy at the holidays and strengthens the collection on the whole Old Grade: A+/Deluxe Grade A+ (always a little extra credit for being the whole act)
Blake Shelton, Cheers, It’s Christmas (Deluxe) The fact that it took him 5 years to add a mere 3 tracks (which add nothing) to the expanded version of his then respectable 2012 offering points to the fact that the motivating factor had little to do with his fans or holiday spirit and everything to do with his girlfriend Gwen Stefani releasing an CD this year so he had to compete (note that their spirited duet does not appear on his collection where it belongs). Nothing new here. Old Grade: B+/Deluxe Grade: B for lack of originality and effort
THE NEW
Hanson, Finally It’s Christmas
Or as I call it, Finally It’s the Long Awaited 20th Anniversary Sequel to One of the Best Pop Christmas Album Surprises Ever by the perennially underrated Brothers Hanson. Since plans were announced last season, this CD was anticipated with mixed expectations. On one hand, their original 1997 Snowed In still stands as one of the clear-cut best pop/rock Christmas compilations in modern history [Holding at #3 on my all time list—see that note also]. On top of that, they had already packed Snowed In with all the best pop holiday songs written with questions left about what was left to record. On the other hand, Mariah Carey followed her definitive 1994 smash hit Merry Christmas with the utterly embarrassing 2010 mess that cost her all her Christmas cred in the process, and she hasn’t been right since. At least they wouldn’t pull a Mariah. The news is that the wait was worth it. Missing is their former youthful exuberance, their scrappy underdog rock star wannabe musicality, and the perfectly selected songs they originally recorded. In their place however are more settled mature voices, more skillful musicianship and arrangement, and a more adult confidence in their still engaging style of (baby) blue eyed soul. Also there is a sense of understanding that they have ironically outlived all their contemporaries, who are now doing anniversary tours as novelty acts while this effort seems like the natural next phase in their career. The boys were always more accomplished musicians then all their booty-shaking, whiny-singing boy band peers put together, and they upped their ante by composing their own music and playing their own instruments. The new original title song is everything a new piece should be—fun, tuneful, catchy, and full of Christmas spirit. They also do one of the few arrangements of Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You” that doesn’t pale, giving it their classic rock-influenced spin. And happily they have found enough other good upbeat tracks to cover with what they do best. “Jingle Bells”, and “Joy to the Mountain” (a mashup of “…..the World” and “Go Tell it on….) are strong covers, while a bluesy “Please Come Home for Christmas” and a plaintive “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” show the depth these guys possess vocally and emotionally. Even drivel like Paul McCartney’s vapid “Wonderful Christmastime” and Stevie Wonder’s lesser “Someday at Christmas” (especially after blowing away Wonder’s “What Christmas Means to Me” on Snowed In) come across significantly less treacly than most subsequent covers (the former is actually better than McCartney’s original take). While not quite as perfect as their original release, this long awaited follow up does exactly what a good sequel should: stand on its own, while still reflecting the spirit of the original without making us long for it. Grade: A+
Gwen Stefani, You Make It Feel Like Christmas The other highly anticipated entry this season is an enthusiastic effort from Stefani, who strikes the perfect balance of what a pop singer should accomplish—good arrangements of a mix of pop and standards that reflect the singer’s style without ruining the spirit of the originals. Like the uber-successful past entries by Leona Lewis and Kelly Clarkson, Stefani wisely understands that a 60s girl group influence meshes perfectly with most pop carols, and she throws herself into the genre with relish. She cheekily immerses herself into her 60s inspiration from slickly inserted Darlene Love/Motown-inspired musical samplings all the way to the CD graphics, with a spot-on salute to the pop princess Greatest Hits album covers of the day (she could be a platinum blonde Connie Francis), right down to the “STEREO” logo proudly and prominently displayed across the top border. She’s best on fun upbeat numbers like “Jingle Bells” and “Let it Snow”, and expectedly sultry on Eartha Kitt’s “Santa Baby”. Her original songs have super catchy Ronnettes-style hooks musically, but upon further listening, most of their lyrics tend towards the pedestrian and trite, missing the holiday mark. The most successful is the original title song, a fun new track (especially after the initial disappointment that it was not a remake of the underappreciated song of the same name by Neil Diamond) with a driving beat lifted from the Supremes’ “You Can’t Hurry Love”. The misfire here may be selecting her current squeeze Blake Shelton to record it with her. Shelton is a much less versatile vocalist than she, and she not only allows him to sing it in his lower, awkward-for-her key, but attempts to compensate for his thick, country, Deliverance twang with a mild fake one of her own (note to Shelton: in the future, it wouldn’t hurt you to stretch yourself on Christmas music and tone down the hayseed like your contemporary Brett Eldridge did oh so successfully last year, instead of sticking with the full Reba when it’s not at all appropriate). But with a girl group CD this strong, it is also a sorely missed opportunity not to include at least one of the classic ladies’ holiday staples, “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” or “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)”. Judging from the other arrangements, she sadly would have knocked either of these out of the ballpark, giving us full out Darlene Love realness. While just shy of the quality of the definitive Clarkson/Lewis gold standard of 2013, Stefani still registers with solid silver here for the holidays. Grade: A+
Sia, Every Day is Christmas
This is a hard one to review. Technically the enigmatic Australian recording artist violated the cardinal rule of recording zero standards. Zero. (Technically, it wasn’t exactly a rule so much as a strong recommendation because who in their right mind would record a Christmas album with absolutely no familiar Christmas music. But it’s a rule now) The result should be disastrous. Yet strangely through the composition of catchy upbeat tunes that fit her offbeat, affected vocal style, the end result isn’t bad. The lone track that doesn’t register is inexplicably the first solo she dropped to preview the album (which heightened pre-release concern), a morose ditty called “Snowman”, which is significantly less Frosty and more the murderous mutant Jack Frost of the horror film franchise. Grade: B+ (half grade deduction for not following the rules. Zero Christmas music!)
98˚, Let It Snow!
The 90s B Boy Band, who was always a poor man’s Backstreet, regroup to record an album revisiting their brand—Diet Motown performed by 4 blue eyed soul-less white boys. One had hoped that 20 years of maturity would have added some richness, experience, and color to still heartthrob lead Nick Lachey’s fluid but bland tenor. But at 44, Lachey is still singing like he is 16 (and not in a good way; being pretty isn’t good enough anymore). Their 20 year reunion effort may have been more impressive had they not had the misfortune of debuting alongside contemporary rivals Hanson in their 20 year reunion effort. The Brothers Hanson (now, as then) again accentuate the deficiencies of the Brothers Lachey, vocally and musically. Still the CD is an engaging outing with fun if not artistic or particularly soulful arrangements, and makes for an impressive enough compilation. Covers of “What Christmas Means to Me”, “Please Come Home for Christmas”, the title song, and even some reverent fare like “O Little Town of Bethlehem” and “The First Noel” don’t disappoint, they just don’t exactly excite either. Even so, it’s a welcome entry with solid enough tracks for playlist consideration. Grade: A-
Fantasia, Christmas After Midnight Just what we need in 2017—a slinky, overly-sexualized Christmas CD for drunken make out music. Heavy on bar closing jazzy arrangements, at least Fantasia pulls back on that fake squawking quackery she seemed to be perfecting in her returning champion American Idol performances and comes across more like a whiskey-voiced jazz chanteuse that’s supposed to be a Jessica Rabbit sex kitten but turns out to be just a poor man’s Eartha Kitt. Nothing is as terrible or as embarrassing as it could be (except the atrocious “Santa Claus Go Straight to the Ghetto”, which sounds like a mediocre SNL skit. Please stop recording this trash heap of a song!). Maybe this one just really needs to be listened to at the end of a long, exhausting day of Christmas Eve preparation with a drunken side piece and a half a bottle of wine consumed, as the title suggest. Grade: C-
Megan Hilty, A Merry Little Christmas
Broadway siren Hilty actually released this CD last year, but too late for consideration or review. Miss Hilty is one of Broadway’s most loved and most talented rising stars, a former Glinda who made a name for herself nailing Dolly Parton’s role in her musical version of 9 to 5. But she is best known to the non-theatre folk as bad girl Ivy Lynn who was bent on crushing nice girl Katherine McPhee’s dreams on the cult TV hit Smash. Miss Hilty provides a smooth evening of the usual emotive vocals and bittersweet standards such as “The Christmas Song” and “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”. Like the usual Broadway based performers with tiny budgets, the flaw is the thin accompaniment, which is basically a supper club combo performing cabaret style arrangements, but Miss Hilty’s expert vocals make up for the musical inadequacies. Grade: B+ for theatre queens, B for the general public.
Girls Aloud, Chemistry (Bonus Package) The British/Irish reality show girl group tries a novel approach. Instead of producing and marketing a Christmas CD this year, they have attached an entire Christmas CD as a bonus gift to their existing hit pop album Chemistry. For grading purposes here, only the Christmas portion will be considered, and it’s a strong entry. Choosing a slightly different girl group approach, instead of going for the usual Shirelles/Ronnettes 60s sound, they attack full on Go Gos/Bengals 80s for their stylistic influences. While not as effective as the proven 60s stylistics, it does hearken a little to the sounds of the original Very Special Christmas collections, which defined a new generation of Christmas music. Upbeat and fun if not vocally complex, they score best with expected selections like “Jingle Bell Rock” and Wizzard’s “I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day”. They also release a few fun original pieces like “I Want to Kiss You So”. Not a must have, but a pleasant enough diversion that fills in a few blanks on the annual playlist. Oh yeah, and they gave it to you for free. Grade: B+ (upgraded a half grade for demonstrating the generosity of the Christmas season)
2017 MOST DISAPPOINTING CD
This one was an easy call. It was an overall pleasing degree of offerings this season, and the lone standout is Fantasia’s pointless Christmas After Midnight. While I actually admire the effort to do something outside of the pop/hiphop block or turning out recycled, second rate ghosts of Christmas R&B past like Mary J. Blige drearily trots out every few years, this is the kind of album that needs a Sarah Vaughn or Ella Fitzgerald to pull off. Fantasia doesn’t quite live up to those expectations.
2017 BEST OVERALL CD
This one is the closest call since the great Leona Lewis and Kelly Clarkson showdown of 2013, with the major difference that they were similar styles and could go head to head on secondary merits. This year the superior offerings of Hanson and Gwen Stefani pose a different dilemma: what works better, boy rock or girl pop? Stylistically within those parameters, the arrangements and the artistry are both first rate.
So this one forced me to go back to my scientific statistical background for further in-depth analysis. I returned to my criteria, and evaluated the ratio of standards and carols to original pieces, the quality of both, and approriateness of both music and lyrics of original pieces, then gave bonus points for extra efforts. Between the two, they recorded three of the four lamest pop songs in the Christmas cannon that should never be duplicated, and both improve vastly on their bland originals. Hanson basically rewrote Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime” (thankfully) and makes it not only tolerable but legitimately good. Their take on Stevie Wonder’s sedate “Someday at Christmas” instills a more wistful quality, which adds a layer of depth. Stefani smartly lays a sleek Shirelles spin on the George Michaels’ cloying “Last Christmas” so smoothly that one barely realizes it’s the same dreadful song (again directly proving that 60s grooves blend better than any other decade for pop Christmas music). Hanson received extra credit for a great follow up that matched the quality of the original, Stefani for her playful 60s immersion all the way down to sampling other 60s artists, with extra special credit for the fun and clever 60s kitsch packaging to complete the theme.
[NOTE: Statistical analysis data to follow. If that bores you, skip to the next paragraph for results]
That and one day of exclusive play of each album top to bottom in order. Hanson has an impressive 10/3 ratio of standards to original, Stefani an even 6/6. Hanson lands 9/10 of the standards (a vanity throwaway “Rudolph” by Hanson: the Next Generation is pointless) and 3/3 on all aspects of the original material. It’s a strong flow top to bottom. Stefani nails all 6/6 of the standards but her original material is a mixed bag. On the surface, the melodies are initially catchy, immersed in the 60s influence, and well orchestrated. (Stefani over all excels on all arrangements, but she pays someone very talented to arrange those and has a much healthier budget for production values; the Hanson boys do the bulk of their own.) But upon further listening, the lyrics are quite banal. The most questionable is “Never Kissed Anyone with Blue Eyes Before”. What the hell? It’s Christmas, Gwen! There was even consideration that Hanson has already won a title, Stefani is new blood. They both took a single point nepotism hit, Stefani for pushing her crossover country boyfriend on us to the detriment of her own sound, Hanson for trotting out their significantly less studio ready offspring.
Requiring an infinite amount of such nit picking (and a final listen to both to make sure the results we justified), points awarded favor, by the slightest of margin, naming Hanson’s Finally It’s Christmas Best Overall CD of 2017. But like the Clarkson/Lewis match-up, they are both two of the strongest and most enjoyable CDs of the millennium. Stefani would have cleaned up any year in between.
So, as far as the resulting playlist, we’re kind of starting from scratch. I’ve exhausted the superior music from the best CDs of previous years, and last year barely provided enough for its own decent playlist. (I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I experienced Great Depression anxiety and pulled a track or two to hoard for next year in case it’s a meager one again.)
In that spirit, let me reiterate my final plea from last season, modified slightly: “A very special thank you, Isaac, Taylor, and Zac Hanson for being the only act I pleaded to that heeded my call for a new entry. Your work exceeded my expectations. I would hence like to issue an open ended Christmas wish to Michael Bublé, David Archuleta, Home Free, Cher, Adam Lambert, One Direction, and, especially, the insanely talented cast of CW’s Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (come on, guys, Glee did one every year and even Nashville tossed me a great effort; you’re better than all of them!): All I want for Christmas (2017) is a slew of new Christmas albums from you guys. I desperately need new material with great character. And thank you, Gwen Stefani for stepping up on your own with a fantastic surprise.”
So after all the effort and tedious analysis, I give you Mark’s Christmas Playlist 2017 (in order to be played, not by merit):
ROCKIN’ AROUND THE CHRISTMAS TREE 2017
1) JINGLE BELLS (Gwen Stefani)–Strong way to open her album and this playlist. Stefani excels best with the girl group style here. Bonus points for the multiple Darlene Love salutes, from borrowing her “Sleigh Ride” intro to slyly working in a sampling of “Wait Til My Bobby Gets Home”. The best track of the album.
2) CANDY CANE LANE (Sia)–The catchiest of her new made-up fake Christmas songlist.
3) WHAT CHRISTMAS MEANS TO ME (98˚)–Twenty years ago the boys jammed with Stevie Wonder on “True to Your Heart” for Disney’s Mulan. Twenty years later, they do Wonder justice saluting his best Christmas composition.
4) FINALLY IT’S CHRISTMAS (Hanson)–The brothers score with their original title song which has all the spirit of their previous album with more musicianship and their new, more mature sound.
5) I WISH IT COULD BE CHRISTMAS EVERYDAY (Girls Aloud)–Their salute to the solid gold 80s beats works best on the Wizzard standard
6) ROCKIN’ AROUND THE CHRISTMAS TREE (Jordan Smith)–No one recorded the mandatory title song this year (Hanson has a bye because they recorded one of the best versions ever 20 years ago. Gwen Stefani, what’s your excuse?), so we pulled a contender from last year.
7) HERE COMES SANTA CLAUS (This Year’s Girl)–It’s who you know. Fortunately, I know an extremely talented young performer I directed in Mary Poppins this year whose equally talented mom fronts a popular local Delaware band. Lead singer and friend Laura Moss slipped me this cover for consideration and it’s honestly as good as any I’ve ever used, and better than many. Thanks for trusting me with your art! #SupportLocalArtists
8) SILVER BELLS (Olivia Newton-John & John Farnham)–One of my favorite standards and the two blend sweetly.
9) HOLLY JOLLY CHRISTMAS (Kris Allen)–I had the pleasure of seeing the season 8 American Idol winner in a very intimate Christmas concert in Annapolis this month and he stated this was his favorite Christmas song (because Burl Ives “tore it up”). Here’s thanks for a great evening, Kris.
10) PLEASE COME HOME FOR CHRISTMAS (Hanson)–The brothers doing what they do best, even better now that they’re old enough to really get it.
11) RUN RUN RUDOLPH (98˚)–Lachey run runs away with a fun arrangement of the Chuck Berry classic.
12) WINTER WONDERLAND (Brett Eldridge)–The country singer proved a blast last year trading his hayseed twang for big band swing. Another winning cut from last year’s Best CD
13) AWAY IN A MANGER (Pentatonix)–It’s new and it’s Pentatonix. By definition, it’s here..
14) IT’S BEGINNING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS (Olivia Newton-John & John Farnham)–There can never be enough good versions of this very under-recorded standard. Miss Newton-John and Farnham are delightful. If only they had split the duet at some point for him to sing the sadly neglected counterpoint melody “Pine Cones & Holly Berries” (from its origins in Here’s Love, Meredith Wilson’s musical version of Miracle on 43th Street,). Just once, before I retire this list, please can someone contemporary revive that?
15) LET IT SNOW (Gwen Stefani)–Stefani scoring again with bright 60s stylings, this time a touch of “Mr. Sandman”
16) JOY TO THE MOUNTAIN (Hanson)–Going mock gospel here, the brothers mash up “Joy to the World” and “Go Tell It On the Mountain” in a nice change of pace.
17) BAD GIRLS NEED CHRISTMAS TOO (Sarah Schmidt)–Joined by the final cast of Jersey Boys, this entry on last year’s annual Carols for a Cure CD, where performers from each show of the current Broadway season donate their talents to raise funds for Equity Fights AIDS, provides Miss Schmidt giving us a mock Angels hit, if MTV parody queen Julie Brown was the girl group’s lead singer.
18) SANTA BABY (Megan Hilty)–Every year I say we need a break from this overly done song, and every year somebody records a version that I can’t resist. Miss Hilty’s sultry belt (yes, she shows the two are not mutually exclusive here) settles once and for all who legitimately should have earned the sought after role of Marilyn Monroe in the cult TV hit Smash’s mythical musical Bombshell. #TeamIvy
19) BLUE CHRISTMAS (David Cassidy & the Partridge Family)–This past Thanksgiving, we lost David Cassidy, one of my first personal legends, and it hurt particularly bad. Cassidy, along with Elton John, were the earliest influences on what would become my own personal vocal style over the years (“I Think I Love You” is still my go-to karaoke fallback). I had the pleasure of seeing Cassidy alongside real-life brother Shaun on Broadway as twins separated at birth in 1992’s Blood Brothers, with pop legend Petula Clark as their downtrodden mom. I had the opportunity to meet Cassidy at the stage door and thank him for all he had given me. So this year, he deserved a throwback to the David Cassidy that helped make me the performer I am today, as we all know and love him. I originally wanted a peppier, more fun Keith Partridge song to reflect what David really was to us all back then, but this song just said it all. Thank you, David, with all my heart, for everything. It will indeed be a blue, blue, blue Christmas without you.
20) CHRISTMAS EVE (Blackmore’s Night)–The English duo with the sound that’s the love child of ABBA and Manheim Steamroller updated their 2013 hit this year for radio play in English, German, and both. A nice last bright song before a solemn close. (Aside, is it just me or should Kelly Clarkson look a little more closely at its similarities to “My Life Would Suck Without You”?)
21) O HOLY NIGHT (Kris Allen)–Allen also pulled off a beautiful and very unassuming version of this traditionally blown out hymn. Even without all the theatrics and fireworks, it’s still a perfect song. The first track was his favorite Christmas song. This was mine.
22) HOW GREAT THOU ART (Jennifer Hudson & Pentatonix)–Yes, I agree this isn’t a Christmas song, it’s a standard hymn. But it’s become the staple of all a capella CDs over the last few years so it gets the pass (if my boys from Home Free say it counts, it counts). And a song by either artist would have been enough, but combined, powerful.
23) I’LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS (Peter Hollens)–Gorgeous enough in Hollens’ smooth Bublé/Groban/Connick way, and then remind yourself that he is one man singing all the a capella lines alone. Hollens earns a spot any year he records something.
(All selections except This Year’s Girl available for preview or purchase at Amazon.com and iTunes, and available through Spotify)
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